Sunday, January 5, 2014

My club

I originally wrote this like a month ago and never posted it...

If you know me very well you know that I don't really give a F.  For instance tonight I went to Kroger for oreo cookies winter survival food and I was dressed like a homeless person.  See:
I wore the hoody because I already had that on and the sweat pants.  Right before I left (in regular shoes) The Ex said, "Your sweat pants are going to get wet."  So, I changed out of my Birkenstocks and tucked my pants in these ugly green boots that I love.  The blanket thingy you see if actually really cute, but not on top of a Broncos hoody.  Anyway, my point is:  I don't give a F.  When people looked at me in the grocery as if I was a mentally deranged person, I felt a surge of pride.  So, I am the president of the I-don't-give-a-F club.  It has a few members:

Me:  you see the outfit above?  That happens a lot.  I was known in college to get up for class, brush my teeth and head to whatever class I was going to.  This is before cutesy Victoria Secret yoga/pajama pants.  They were like the ugly flannel Walmart men's pajama bottoms and a WKU t-shirt.  No make up, no brush in my hair, and whatever random pair of shoes was closest to my dorm room exit.  

The Ex:  he wears things like black dress socks up to his knees with shorts to lift weights.  He also wore this hat for like 10 years:
He obviously doesn't give a F, so he's in.

mh1:  To the UofL women's game yesterday she wore a UofL t-shirt, nylon running pants (so far, so good) and knee high leather boots with the pants tucked in them.  She doesn't give a F, so she's in the club, too.

mh2:  I can't even begin to describe the things she's willing to wear.  The more it doesn't match, the more apt she is to wear it.  She doesn't give a F, she's in.

My dad:  We went to Olive Garden last night.  He wore a pair of 3-D glasses that you get for free at the movies... with the lenses out. (He also took the time to sharpie the "3d" words on the sides so they looked more "real".  He's been wearing them for like 3 days.  

You think he gives a F?  Nah.  

Pisces (my dog):  She gets in the kitchen garbage when I'm not home and sometimes eats turds in the backyard....she really doesn't give a F.

People in my family that aren't in the club:

mh3:  Her little 3-year-old self likes to wear dresses and match (though she has been known to wear athletic socks with patent leather dress shoes)...she's not in the club but I'll continue to monitor her level of giving a F to see if one day she can enter.  Either way, she's cute.

Baby S:  When she gives a F, she really gives a F.  She's so pretty when she does care, that it makes up for the times she doesn't (so I'm not sure if she's in or not).  On second thought, my little baby nieces are always cute and dressed so precious.  She's out.

My mom:  She's too pretty to be in the club.

If you are interested in becoming a member, you cannot be one of those people that forces their kids to wear what you tell them.  You have to be like me and just be happy when they are dressed and ready to go. (Don't worry, if they're dressed too crazy- when you're out in public just pretend like you don't know them, like I do).   If your child has a  hair bow for every outfit, you cannot be in the club.  If you force your son or daughter to wear clothes that he can't play in for the sake of being cute, you cannot join.  If you are a dude and use an umbrella, you're out.  Or if you're a dude and drive a sports car, automatic rejection of your application on the premise that you give too many Fs.

Look, I'm not saying my club is the best, but low maintenance is usually less stressful.  While my kids aren't always the cutest dressed, when it comes to getting ready I don't stress about wardrobe.  As long as you are dressed for the weather and the activity, we're good.  I also feel like less emphasis on their appearance is better for their self esteem in the long run.  I am hoping this cultivates their desire to focus on what is on the inside.  And, don't get me wrong, dressing appropriately is important but stressing about it, isn't.
Things going on in my life at the moment :
  • The Ex just got promoted to purple belt in BJJ.  He's awesome, I'm proud. 
  • The Ex is about to lay hard wood floors in our house.  We just have to pick it out.  I think I'm going with Brazilian cherry.
  • My Dad just sent me some Fleetwood Mac songs and I have "Over my Head" on repeat
  • I just recently discovered Calvin Harris.  God bless the Scots.  If I would have known of him 10 years ago I might have reconsidered who would father my children.  See below:

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Escape Night

This post started off with random thoughts and then I came up with a new term....

  • Song that's in my head right now:

  • But I'm listening to Lorde on my iTunes right now.  FYI...all the songs on her album sound the same but I still like it.  Tennis Court is my favorite.
  • I just watched Wish You Were Here on Netflix.  It's good, check it.
  • I usually read everyday but I haven't read in the last few days.  It's because I am reading Wicked and I can't get into it.  I need something else to read.  Right now I have Fracture (thanks to Crystal!) and Havisham (the prelude to one of my very favorite books Great Expectations) waiting to be read.
  • The end of my Christmas break is coming near.  I am going to be so tired when I go back to work because I like to stay up until after midnight and not get up until 10.  Today, I didn't take a shower or put on a bra.    It seems like the only time I put on makeup or get "dressed" is when I go to work.  I should always work because if I didn't I would end up looking like a homeless crackhead all of the time.  Plus, my poor husband only gets to see me out of sweat pants and with a bra on when I am going to my job-e-job.
  • You know what I hate???  I hate when married people talk about going on dates.  You's a lie.  Y'all ain't dating!  You're going out to eat food without a bunch of kids bothering you.  Dates are for single people.  The Ex and I are going out to eat and to a movie tomorrow night.  We aren't dating-   we are ESCAPING!!!  Let me explain...we get in the car with the 3 mini humans, we drive to my Dad's...we slow down long enough that they can jump out without getting injured.  We drive away fast enough that he can't change his mind...we have ESCAPED!  So, from now on it's called Escape Night.  Anyway, tomorrow night we have Escape night. We're going to sushi and a movie.  I'll put on a bra and deodorant.