Anywho: The Ex is at the Fire House tonight. The girls and I usually do the same thing whenever he's not home. Usually dinner (tonight it was Pina Fiesta because we have no groceries and I love that place), then chillin' on the couch. Tonight we chilled on the couch and painted toe nails and finger nails. We popped popcorn (the real kind, air popped from the air popper thingy my dad bought us for Christmas), and I stalked people I don't know on Facebook while they watched Tinkerbell. When I was putting them to bed the door bell rang. I walked to the door but no one was there (I don't answer the door when The Ex isn't home because I will either buy what they are selling or get raped/murdered...I can't afford either) so I didn't think anything about it even though Pisces was still acting like someone was around. She kept walking to the front and back doors, finally she started barking at the front door. I look out and no one is there. I generally do not get scared of much (especially when my kids are in the house because I know if someone came in here- one of us is going to die before you get to the kids). Even though I don't get scared, I do have an imagination. I started imagining I was in that movie, The Strangers. see trailer to refresh your memory:
It's a decent movie, and even though I thought about it, I'm not your average white-girl-in-a-horror-flick. I'm not at the door like, "Who's there? Hello? Who's there?" So, I just ignored it and turned on the alarm.
Yeah, that was pretty anti-climatic, moving on.
I've mentioned before that I started practicing Jiu Jitsu. I competed in my first tournament last Saturday. The Ex competed also, and my Dad and his Dad came out to support us. Nervous isn't the feeling that I had. It was more like a state of disconnect of mind/body. I lost my first match. After I watched the video I wasn't too disappointed with my performance:
My second match started as soon as the first was over. I was still winded from the first match and I was confused about what had actually just happened (I can't remember the first match, adrenaline is weird). Also, The Ex wasn't expecting me to go up as fast either, so he went to the bathroom. I knew he wasn't there, and I remember thinking, "What am I supposed to do if he's not here?" As if he does the work for me. It is an odd feeling to depend on someone's presence alone, that much. He got back half way through the second match. While it is embarrassing for me to watch this, I love hearing my teammates Bradley and Tim desperately try to encourage/coach me. All I could hear were their voices and I did my best to listen, but I was having trouble with basic commands (seriously, someone said something about, "Take your right hand and ..." I had to stop and think about which hand was my right)...This is the last 2 minutes of the 2nd match (the match that I actually won is next, if you want to skip this):
The match that I won:
I was so much more relaxed during this match. I didn't feel scared anymore because I had already gotten my @ss handed to me, so I just went out to do my best without any pressure (though I do wish I would have tried harder to get a submission). If you're wondering why I'm walking off the mat with my hands and arms just kinda hanging there, it's because they were. I could barely feel them from the muscle fatigue. The best part is at the end when my Dad interviewed me.
If you want to see something really cool, watch The Ex choke a fool in less than 40 seconds:
He came in 2nd place and I was really proud of him.
Anywho, I had fun at the tournament and I want to do another one but the next time, I promise myself to try not to panic. I want my husband, daughters, instructors/coaches, teammates, and Dad to be proud of me.