Not much to talk about

Mh1 started kindergarten this week and she loves it.

I made it to the Y 6 times this week even though I went back to work. I was really worried my fat, lazy butt would get back to work and quit hitting the gym. Plus, I have a great workout partner that holds me accountable to get there.

For real, if I could quit eating things like icing, cookies, brownies, cakes, candy...I would be like 20 lbs. lighter.

I have no desire to go to the fair, yet TLB is itching to go everyday. I do not find $6 beers/cokes, $10 corn dogs, cow poop, giant pigs, shady roller coasters, or country music appealing in any way. I would rather lay on the couch and watch reruns of Entourage or True Blood rather than fight a crowd of teenagers smoking ciggarettes and fat drunk girls looking for a date.

I told a really rude person on the phone that I found their "condescending attitude more than offensive"....Later in the conversation he said (in a condescending tone), "Mrs. Lawn Boy, I did not mean to be condensation earlier." That made the conversation we had earlier almost worth it.

Lacking in that department

As a teacher, if you could only have one good quality, it should probably be organization. Anyone that knows me, knows that this is something I do not have. Everything from my refrigerator, hard drive, make up drawer, CLOSET, purse, car console....you get the point. One of my favorite bloggers dedicated an entire post to her closet and how it is organized. For real? I don't get it. There are so many things that I would rather do than organize my closet. Things like...sit on the couch. Every once in a blue moon (like every 3 or so years) I get a wild hair and clean out my closet. The organization only lasts about 1 day (I'm serious) so I don't see the point. I only organize when I find it difficult to find things. Plus, I have kids that literally walk behind me as I am putting things in their place, just to pull something else out and throw it in a place it doesn't belong. So, this blogger makes my skin crawl. It doesn't make me feel any better to have a clean closet vs. having a dirty closet so I totally don't understand you annoying people that are like, "How is your pantry, drawer, car, purse, desk, entertainment ctr. like that? That would drive me crazy!" Oh shut up, I have a book to read or Big Brother to watch.

Family Vacation

A few days ago, at the last minute we decided to take the mini-humans to Great Wolf Lodge for a night. The place is ridiculously expensive but it is very nice. The kids loved it. I packed our bags the morning before we left and as we were driving down our street headed out of town, I had a fleeting thought...Did I forget my bathing suit bottoms? I ignored the thought and we drove 2 hours. Once we arrived, we ran to our hotel room and changed into our swim suits. That's when I realized I should have paid more attention to the things that pass through my brain. I had in fact, forgotten my bottom. So, I walked to the gift shop and asked the girl behind the counter where the cheapest bathing suit in the store was. She looked me up and down with her lip curled up a little and said, "Do you want a one piece or a 2 piece?" I replied, "I don't care, I just need a bathing suit that doesn't cost $100." I ended up finding one on my own and it was $38. That really made me mad, but what choice did I have? I get back to the room and just put those bottoms on with my top. I realized after a few minutes in the water that I needed a smaller size bottoms. I will spare you the details, but I looked down a few times (after feeling a draft) and realized that my "lady parts" were on display for all of the 9-year-olds in the wave pool. So, I was paranoid the rest of the day. The next day I rigged up the bottoms so that my lady parts didn't show anymore. The problem with my fix up job was that it caused the back of the suit to hang down. So, no longer were my "lady parts" showing but now my butt crack was all up in ere'body's vision. When it was almost time for us to leave this younger girl walked up to me and said, "I need to invest in a mom bathing suit like that." Wow. Not only am I practically naked but now I am wearing a "mom bathing suit". Next time I am wearing a thong bikini and I don't give a eff.

Things you should never say to a woman

A man should never say something like, "You wouldn't believe all I have to do in the morning." Especially when the woman that he is saying it around, is the person that runs around like a freaking maniac with her hair on fire taking care of HIS children in the morning. For real, I know this lady that jumps out of bed, runs (literally) to the coffee pot, runs (literally) back to the bathroom and gets in the shower (she doesn't even have time to take a pee- she just does it in the shower.....I kid) so that she can have approximately 3.75 minutes of silence before answering really deep questions like, "Why do flowers grow in the grass?" or "Why is the neighbor going to work?". Once the questions begin in addition to the madness of getting ready to go to work/school the anxiety level sky rockets. So, men should never NEVER complain about how hectic their mornings can be.

I really...

was just window shopping online and the thought occured to me, "Can I have those?" But in my mind I wasn't asking myself like a normal person does. I was imagining calling my dad and asking that question. Not that I would ever do that (now), I just remembered when I was a kid and that was all that I had to do. I found something I liked and I asked for it. Either I got it or I didn't. What is even funnier is that I thought life was so hard then. I thought that fighting with my boyfriend over a missed phone call was the end of the Earth. I had no idea I would become an adult and have to pay for things like the central air unit, dishwasher, washing machine, car breaks, oil changes, school uniforms, and toilet paper. I had no idea that my parents worried about me all the time. I had no idea how much they loved me while I was daydreaming about blue jeans and new make up.

Random

You probably didn't know that :

I sometimes make mental plans in case of alien or al-Qaeda invasion. I can't give you the specifics (in case you are "compromised") but it does include my stock in the pantry. I don't really worry about alien invasion but I do worry about terrorists. I know my first action (besides collecting the mhs) is filling the bath tubs with water. Then, I would get all the can goods together and we would hit the road. I can't tell you where but it's a pretty good place. If the roads somehow were unpassable, we could walk where we are going. It might take a while, but we would get there.

Pesto is my new favorite condiment but I'm not sure if it's supposed to be used as a condiment

I still like Sarah Palin

I do not like the ocean or sand but I love laying on the beach

Sixteen Candles was my favorite movie since I was 5. It still is. Does that mean I have some maturing to do?

I ALWAYS freak out the day before I have to take a test. For some reason I always predict that I will do terribly. (This is because I never do any type of preparation for exams). I just took the Praxis for my new certification. I paid $120 to take the test and I didn't study at all. The night before the test I freaked out and just "knew" that I wasn't going to pass it. Once I get to the test and they say, "Begin" it's like a switch comes on in my brain and all the anxiety is gone. So, I don't consider a person that has test anxiety, I am a person that has anxiety from not being prepared. I will get the results in 4 weeks. I have no idea how I did. I knew the stuff, but it was all essay and who's to say that whoever is reading my answers agrees with my thinking or writing style.

I am super pumped to get back to work. I am so blessed to have a job I love.

I call my daycare every once in a while just to check on the girls. I am freaked out thinking that I won't be able to do that for mh1 at her new school anymore. Before I know it, she'll be in middle school and high school. Crazy

I read an article that a friend suggested and it made me think of how many times a day people will stop me (when I am with the girls by myself) and say, "Wow, you've got your hands full." As if they feel sorry for me. I don't really get it, because it's not like they misbehave very often (in public at least). A man the other day said, "Look at all those helpers you have." That was so much more kind for the girls to hear. I don't want them to ever think they are a burden to me.

Be nice to you

I just finished reading this blog article. I LOVED it! It was so right on. A lot of women I know are always working on losing weight or getting in shape. If they somehow fail it is because they didn't not have the one essential component necessary for their journey. Believing in themselves. My friend Amber gained a few pounds over a few months. She was telling me how disgusting she was and how gross she was and blah, blah, blah. I asked her if she would ever say anything like that about me (being gross and disgusting, fat or ugly). Of course she wouldn't because she loves me. Why then, is it so easy to talk to ourselves in that way? Why is it ok for me to call my arms "bat wing arms" when I would never say anything like that to anyone else out of fear of hurting them???

So, ladies (and gents) it's time to STOP the negative talk! It's time to get out of the shower and get dressed without criticizing various flaws that make us all so different and special.