I am related to at least two (that I know of). I had the honor of escorting one of the pill heads that I am related to shopping at the mall today. I cannot mention the name of the person nor the relation because my Dad will get really po'd for airing our family's dirty laundry on the internet, plus he lives in this happy place called denial. Guess what makes today so special? The fact that it is 5 days before Christmas. So, not only am I carting around a sloppy, slurred words, confused doper, I am also fighting traffic and crowds. I did find a bit of solace in JCPenney at one point. This was because EVERYTHING was on sale and I also had a coupon for 15% off. I was on a mission for skinny jeans, so I told my pill head prisoner (or wait am I the prisoner?) to sit down. I knew the pill head prison/warden would be ok in the chair by the dressing room because they were playing "The Dog Whisper" on the courtesy TV (that I think is intended to keep all the husbands occupied). Why did I think she would be ok? I think because I was hoping some of "The Dog Whisperer" commands would somehow travel through the tv waves to her brain and when he said, "Sit" she would do just that. Apparently, "The Dog Whisper" was a little too effective because when I was finished with my shopping and told her it was time to go she said (while pointing to the TV), "It'll be over in 5 minutes. I'll be ready then."
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