Obsessive

Sometimes I think about things and instead of being thoughts they become obsessions.  I probably have some type of mental illness...I've written about my various "interests" here.  Today I am obsessing over the dumb crap about banning the word "bossy".  For real, for real:  I've been called bossy my whole life.  You know what, I am.  I always think I know what's best about everything.  I find it confusing/amusing when I am actually wrong about something.  I know this about myself and I try to remember that it is ok when someone doesn't agree with me or do what I want them to do.   I've decided all these people that don't like the word, have never been called bossy.  I bet you that women that are in leadership positions have at some point been called bossy, because guess what?  They probably are!  They're good at telling people what to do and they probably were when they were little girls!

I'm going to go ahead and blow your minds here:  I hate to break your hearts but men are usually better in leadership positions.  You know why?  They don't things personally.  So, there are more men in charge because they are typically better at it- not because a bunch of little girls were called bossy in 1960 shutting down their personalities ending their future of being a CEO.   P.S. You know where I'm best at being bossy? At my house- where I run this mother trucker!  The Ex is good at things, but I'm like really awesome at running the Strange household.  Furthermore, if anyone told me that I was good at running my household I would be flattered because it's the most important job I've ever or will ever have.  I'll leave running companies to men.  Go ahead and get over your false cry of sexism.  While your boo hooing, I'll write about something else....

I'm reading 2 books right now:  The Life of Jesus According to Biff.  Hilarious but sacrilegious.  Also reading The Husband's Secret.  Why 2 at once you ask?  Depends on the mood I'm in when I read.  Plus, I've been starting a lot of books lately without finishing them.

Let's see what else, I can think of....I had a birthday yesterday.  It was good.  I got an awesome new pair of rain boots from The Ex.  So I can give you a guarantee that Derby will be beautiful because I have new boots to wear.  If I didn't have boots it would rain, you're welcome.

Mh1 turned 8 the other day.  She had a good one.  She's starting her first year of softball and so far...she's really bad at it.  It's all good though, she's having fun and she'll get stronger and better as the season goes on.  She wants to do well and she's got a really good coach and some super cheerleaders.  I'm happy to watch her and I'm proud no matter what.

Mh3 turned 4 a few weeks ago.  That's really sad because she really isn't a baby anymore.  We still call her, "The baby" and she'll probably have that name the rest of her life.  She's still as funny as ever and she still makes my soul sing.

My club

I originally wrote this like a month ago and never posted it...

If you know me very well you know that I don't really give a F.  For instance tonight I went to Kroger for oreo cookies winter survival food and I was dressed like a homeless person.  See:

I wore the hoody because I already had that on and the sweat pants.  Right before I left (in regular shoes) The Ex said, "Your sweat pants are going to get wet."  So, I changed out of my Birkenstocks and tucked my pants in these ugly green boots that I love.  The blanket thingy you see if actually really cute, but not on top of a Broncos hoody.  Anyway, my point is:  I don't give a F.  When people looked at me in the grocery as if I was a mentally deranged person, I felt a surge of pride.  So, I am the president of the I-don't-give-a-F club.  It has a few members:

Me:  you see the outfit above?  That happens a lot.  I was known in college to get up for class, brush my teeth and head to whatever class I was going to.  This is before cutesy Victoria Secret yoga/pajama pants.  They were like the ugly flannel Walmart men's pajama bottoms and a WKU t-shirt.  No make up, no brush in my hair, and whatever random pair of shoes was closest to my dorm room exit.  

The Ex:  he wears things like black dress socks up to his knees with shorts to lift weights.  He also wore this hat for like 10 years:

He obviously doesn't give a F, so he's in.

mh1:  To the UofL women's game yesterday she wore a UofL t-shirt, nylon running pants (so far, so good) and knee high leather boots with the pants tucked in them.  She doesn't give a F, so she's in the club, too.

mh2:  I can't even begin to describe the things she's willing to wear.  The more it doesn't match, the more apt she is to wear it.  She doesn't give a F, she's in.

My dad:  We went to Olive Garden last night.  He wore a pair of 3-D glasses that you get for free at the movies... with the lenses out. (He also took the time to sharpie the "3d" words on the sides so they looked more "real".  He's been wearing them for like 3 days.  

You think he gives a F?  Nah.  

Pisces (my dog):  She gets in the kitchen garbage when I'm not home and sometimes eats turds in the backyard....she really doesn't give a F.

People in my family that aren't in the club:

mh3:  Her little 3-year-old self likes to wear dresses and match (though she has been known to wear athletic socks with patent leather dress shoes)...she's not in the club but I'll continue to monitor her level of giving a F to see if one day she can enter.  Either way, she's cute.

Baby S:  When she gives a F, she really gives a F.  She's so pretty when she does care, that it makes up for the times she doesn't (so I'm not sure if she's in or not).  On second thought, my little baby nieces are always cute and dressed so precious.  She's out.

My mom:  She's too pretty to be in the club.

If you are interested in becoming a member, you cannot be one of those people that forces their kids to wear what you tell them.  You have to be like me and just be happy when they are dressed and ready to go. (Don't worry, if they're dressed too crazy- when you're out in public just pretend like you don't know them, like I do).   If your child has a  hair bow for every outfit, you cannot be in the club.  If you force your son or daughter to wear clothes that he can't play in for the sake of being cute, you cannot join.  If you are a dude and use an umbrella, you're out.  Or if you're a dude and drive a sports car, automatic rejection of your application on the premise that you give too many Fs.

Look, I'm not saying my club is the best, but low maintenance is usually less stressful.  While my kids aren't always the cutest dressed, when it comes to getting ready I don't stress about wardrobe.  As long as you are dressed for the weather and the activity, we're good.  I also feel like less emphasis on their appearance is better for their self esteem in the long run.  I am hoping this cultivates their desire to focus on what is on the inside.  And, don't get me wrong, dressing appropriately is important but stressing about it, isn't.

 

 

Things going on in my life at the moment :

• The Ex just got promoted to purple belt in BJJ.  He's awesome, I'm proud. 
• The Ex is about to lay hard wood floors in our house.  We just have to pick it out.  I think I'm going with Brazilian cherry.
• My Dad just sent me some Fleetwood Mac songs and I have "Over my Head" on repeat
• I just recently discovered Calvin Harris.  God bless the Scots.  If I would have known of him 10 years ago I might have reconsidered who would father my children.  See below:

Escape Night

This post started off with random thoughts and then I came up with a new term....

• Song that's in my head right now:

• But I'm listening to Lorde on my iTunes right now.  FYI...all the songs on her album sound the same but I still like it.  Tennis Court is my favorite.
• I just watched Wish You Were Here on Netflix.  It's good, check it.
• I usually read everyday but I haven't read in the last few days.  It's because I am reading Wicked and I can't get into it.  I need something else to read.  Right now I have Fracture (thanks to Crystal!) and Havisham (the prelude to one of my very favorite books Great Expectations) waiting to be read.
• The end of my Christmas break is coming near.  I am going to be so tired when I go back to work because I like to stay up until after midnight and not get up until 10.  Today, I didn't take a shower or put on a bra.    It seems like the only time I put on makeup or get "dressed" is when I go to work.  I should always work because if I didn't I would end up looking like a homeless crackhead all of the time.  Plus, my poor husband only gets to see me out of sweat pants and with a bra on when I am going to my job-e-job.
• You know what I hate???  I hate when married people talk about going on dates.  You's a lie.  Y'all ain't dating!  You're going out to eat food without a bunch of kids bothering you.  Dates are for single people.  The Ex and I are going out to eat and to a movie tomorrow night.  We aren't dating-   we are ESCAPING!!!  Let me explain...we get in the car with the 3 mini humans, we drive to my Dad's...we slow down long enough that they can jump out without getting injured.  We drive away fast enough that he can't change his mind...we have ESCAPED!  So, from now on it's called Escape Night.  Anyway, tomorrow night we have Escape night. We're going to sushi and a movie.  I'll put on a bra and deodorant.

2013 in Review

Some of the things that went down for us this year:

Your girl:

• Started BJJ (Brazilian Jiu Jitsu at Derby City Mixed Martial Arts) and I love it (still terrible at it but still working)
• Competed in my first BJJ tournament in June 
• Conquered the rope climb at the gym
• Saw Bruno Mars in concert (with one of my favorite girls Sadie-Leigh)
• Got hired to a do a different job at work and it's pretty awesome (I still miss my old friends/students)

The Ex:

• Just saved a few lives...no big deal
• Won a silver metal in the same BJJ tournament I competed in

MH1

• Got all Os on her report card all year
• Made the cross country team and straight KILLT it (even got 4th place in one of the races this season)

MH2

• Perfected her cartwheel (if you have ever been around the child for any period of time you know she does no less than 100 per day)
• Lost a few teeth
• Is killing 1st grade

MH3

• Learned to write her name
• Sings the heck out of "The Name Game", especially when you ask her to use the word sucker 

Cool things we did as a family in 2013:

• Trained BJJ together
• Went on an awesome vacation to Florida with awesome friends
• Went to Holiday World
• Went to The Beach Water Park
• Saw Big Boi in concert
• Went to the Broncos/Colts game

Some numbers for you:

• I gave approximately 547 baths (3 kids approx. every other day)
• I did approximately 365 loads of laundry (about one a day)
• Kissed a face at least 2000 times (4 people at least once a day everyday)

Something to think about:  I really don't understand everyone that is all like, "2013 sucked, ready for 2014" or "2013 was awesome, ready for 2014".  I don't spend too much time worrying about what was good or bad.  Sure, there were some bullcrap that went down in 2013 and there was some awesome stuff that I'm thankful for, but it was what it was.  I hope 2014 is awesome but I hope tomorrow is awesome.  I'll take each day as it comes.  So, since I don't have any official resolutions, I did tell The Ex I was going to clean the house tomorrow, does that count?

For all of you planning your 2014, I feel like this is the perfect time to share my very favorite bible verse (Phillippians 4:6-7) Do not be anxious about anything, but by prayer and petition with thanksgiving send your requests to God.  

Christmas

Wow!  I am not feeling it this year.  Usually I like decorating and look forward to it.  The Ex did put the lights on the house and they look awesome.  I have 2 Christmas trees that I put up and I collect nativity scenes (so I have about 20 to put out).  I only put the trees up because the girls wanted me to and I only put out my 2 favorite nativities.  I have finished most of my shopping (online!) but I still need to shop for my mom, sister, Dad, Nana, and The Ex's Dad.    If it wasn't for the kids, I probably wouldn't be putting up a tree.  I need to be doing a million things instead of putting up Christmas decorations.  Like, folding laundry:

or mopping sticky kitchen floors or washing dirty baby bodies

or washing my own body (yeah I haven't showered today).  Or make a wholesome dinner (instead of frozen pizza), or working out (I did join Crossfit Regeneration Southwest) or wrap Christmas presents, or clean out the refrigerator or clean my house, or wash my car, or organize my closet.  So, you see Christmas decorations is falling low on the list of priorities.  The interesting thing is, everything I "need" to do is falling low on my list.  Instead of doing what I "need" to do, I have only focused on survival via food for the children (we had french toast for b-fast, chips and pumpkin pie for lunch (I'm not lying) and frozen pizza for dinner, sleep (I slept until 11), washing the dishes (I really can't stand to have dirty dishes), entertainment (Naked and Afraid- the girls LOVE it and Downton Abbey).  So, there you have it:  that's what loser moms do.  We sleep late, make fast meals, and sit around watching TV in day old underwear.  So, instead of looking at Pinterest and feeling bad about your lack of crafting skills and crockpot dinners, read this post and feel better about yourself.  I imagine you quit reading this and think to yourself, "Huh, well I'm not so bad afterall...at least I have good personal hygiene."

Once a month

I think I'm down to only posting each month because I broke my lap top and I don't really like blogging from my phone.  I don't really want to buy another lap top so I don't know...

Things going on in my life that I am narcissistic enough to think you are about:

I fell off the eating-well-and-working-out-5-times-a-week wagon after vacation.  I still haven't recovered.  I have gained about 6 pounds.  That doesn't seem like a lot but I can feel it in my clothes.  Work makes it that much harder to get it back together, but this week has gone decent.

Mh1 made the cross country team at her school.  Why did I bust a tear when she handed me her paper that said she made the team?  A mother's pride is crazy.

Speaking of crazy, one of my parents talked crazy to me at work today.  Some people don't realize that I bend over backwards for and genuinely care about their child.  Being hostile to me for no reason is just plain silly.  Why is there such an "us against them" type of mentality with some parents and some schools?  I want to have a good, working, open relationship with my daughters' school, I assume all parents feel that way. 

I'm not ashamed but I am annoyed that I cannot get Miley's song out of my head.  All of you need to leave that girl alone.  If you don't like her little flat baby bootie, don't watch her.  The other song that I love right now is Gorilla by Bruno Mars.

Show I'm into:  The White Queen
Book I'm into:  The series that The White Queen is based on by Phillipa Gregory
Shows I'm into:  None (I did finish Orange is the New Black and season 1 of The Killing on Netflix, I definitely recommend)

I recently joined a fantasy football league.  It's all women and the team name is something like Vagina Power but I can remember exactly.  I want to win but I have no idea what I'm doing.  All I know is The Ex gave me all of the picks to make and I did, and he said I have a good team.  I feel like if I don't win I won't make him proud.  That's so dumb.  Fantasy football is trying to ruin my marriage.

Anytime I watch The Road Rules/Real World Challenge or the physical challenges on Big Brother I always think I would win.

I was thinking about competing in jiu jitsu in October in Indianapolis but The Ex isn't competing so  I have chickened out.  You would think that I am not competing because I am scared, but actually I am not competing because I do not feel like dealing with the nervousness that would consume me until the time of competition for the weeks leading up.  Just thinking about not doing the competition gave me nervous butterflies in my stomach just now.

One more (not so funny) funny story.  I think I was involved in domestic violence this morning.  I was the aggressor.  The Ex and I got into an argument about something silly.  He was at the kitchen sink and took a hand full of water and threw it in my face (I guess he was trying to be playful but I just did my makeup) in a total reaction I slapped him across the head.  If he would have done that to me, I would have picked up the frying pan and hit him with it.  I'm sorry for being an abusive wife, Boo, but you better know your place next time!

It's been a while

I think I haven't had much to talk about this summer because we pretty do the same thing everyday.  Interesting things happen when we get out of routine and we pretty much do this everyday: 
1.  wake up to alarm screeching sounds that come from hell spawns
2.  attempt to match energy from the little people by drinking at least 8 cups of coffee
3.  make breakfast for the  (same thing pretty much everyday= egg whites, fresh fruit, and oatmeal, cereal, or on the rare occasion pop tart (the little sugar addicts would eat pop tarts everyday)
4.  answer 50 questions like, "What are we going to do today?"  "Can we go to the Y?" "What's for lunch?" (damn it man, didn't you just eat breakfast?) "Can we go swimming?"  The questions never end.
5. go to gym, swimming, dr. appt., or run errands
6.  naps (this is why I love God so much- he created naps to give mothers of young children respite)
7. start dinner or plan on going to dinner with my dad (we have gotten really good at going to the "kids eat free" nights
8.  go to DCMMA to get my @ss whooped (I feel so much better after I leave.  I'm not sure if you know this but kids are stressful, when I leave the gym after doing Boot Camp or Jiu jitsu I feel less stress, this does not mean that I get the endorphin rush everyone talks about- that never happens to me.  Dude, if I could get high from exercise, I would be one skinny little girl).
9. Bedtime
10. party time!  yeah right, crash time

Readers might find this funny:  at the end of BJJ class the instructor/coach has us line up (facing him).  He wraps up the class with advice and what not.  One day he was talking about the importance of breathing and breathing deeply with good posture.  He said something to the effect of don't hunch over the computer when you're on it, sit up tall.  He also said to the class, "Don't be a blogger, be an athlete!"  hahahahahaha  I asked if I could be both.